One step forward two steps back

It seems that no matter how hard we work to get a little bit ahead something always happens to push us back again. Its a never ending cycle of one step forward two steps back. Michael is going to be 16 in a couple of weeks. I got the privilege of going for a drive with him on Sunday. He needs the hours before he can get his license. So we were able to talk for a bit about things. He mentioned he would like to join the military. I support that decision if that is what he really wants to do. He said college isn't for him, I am fine with that as long as he is. If he came to me and said Mom I want to go to college I would help him get there. If he wanted to be a circus clown I would help him with that too. When he was six he didn't want to be Michael anymore he said he didn't like his name and that he wanted his name to be Title Wave so I called him that for a bit. Even when he was 4 and didn't want to live with me anymore and wanted to run away I said ok but you will leave me the exact same way you came into my world so being the supportive parent that I am I allowed him the opportunity to run away by striping him down and putting him outside the door and closing it. It gave him the chance to run away and leave just like he wanted only as he was standing there buck naked outside the door he realized it might not be the best plan so he apologized and I let him back in. The bottom line is I have tried in my own way to be supportive. I don't want him to be unhappy and when he was 13 and wanted to go live with his dad I let him go. He came back and I think he is a better person for being able to make those decisions. He got to see what it was like and he got to do something I never did...get to know his dad. So now he is turning 16 and a big door of responsibility is upon us. As we were driving he made comments about how he wants his license right away and how he wants to be able to drive to school. I asked him how he would pay for the gas to get there. I asked him about his plans for a job. We brought up a ton of things that needed to be talked about and we even butted heads a bit. So today I called the insurance company about a quote for how much its going to cost to add him and the truck full time on our policy and I just about passed out. Our rates are going to triple and things are already tight enough. When I was his age I was working, going to school, paid for my own car insurance, I even bought my first car myself. I played sports and babysat and still had time with friends. I found out also his grades are not at a good level and he is splurging on school lunches when we had a deal of how much lunch money is enough. So now you see when we get a little bit ahead something always happens to push us back. I love him but I think its time for him to get some things on his own. thanks for reading xoxo